Loneliness, unhappiness & the connection to interpersonal communication skills Loneliness is on the rise and has been since the early 2000s. With ongoing concerns about students’ mental health during the pandemic, it’s more important than ever to address the root of the problem: the lack of interpersonal communication.  Why are students more lonely and unhappy than ever? Research from psychologist and Macmillan Learning author David Myers found that while some factors like religion, volunteering and fitness have a slight impact on happiness, the thing that makes the most impact is having satisfying relationships. Not just romantic relationships, but also connections with friends, family, co-workers, and fellow students. The way to develop these meaningful, and sustaining relationships is interpersonal communication. Addressing the Lack of Interpersonal Communication in the Classroom It’s challenging to address lack of interpersonal communication when students are more dependent than ever on technology in many aspects of their lives -- from their regular access to social media to their remote classes while they were confined during the pandemic. The screen that has allowed them to connect with people is simultaneously isolating them as well as becoming a scale for self esteem (which is a concept worthy of an entire blog.) But there are steps instructors can take to help students to establish and enhance interpersonal communications in and beyond the classroom. According to Steven McCornack, Professor at University of Alabama at Birmingham, “Sustaining relationships is a mental health imperative and interpersonal comms is a way to address it.” 8 Tips for Teaching & Developing Interpersonal Skills in Students Last week’s webinar about interpersonal relationships in a post-COVID world with professors and authors Steven McCormack and Kelly Morrison, Professor of Communication Studies at the University of Alabama at Birmingham hosted by Macmillan Learning introduced some steps that instructors can take both in and out of the classroom to help develop these skills in students. While some tips are specific to Communication classes, others can be used in just about any class. Here are eight tips: 1. Don’t start the semester with a “syllabus day.” Steven and Kelly start out class with a question:  “What is the most important thing that drives your life’s happiness.” This helps develop community within the class and gets the students to start talking. And, for their class in particular, it’s helpful to lead into the content as to why their course on interpersonal communication is important. 2. Use name tags in class for in-person classes. While many students can identify the faces of the other students in their class, not as many are familiar with their names. Having name tags is like opening a door to say hello, and continues throughout the semester to create community. 3. Have music on before class. Having music creates an environment that encourages conversations. Steven consults his son on a playlist so that he has the most current music on, whereas Kelly prefers more upbeat music. No matter the kind, music is a great conversation starter. 4. Gently push students not to use devices. While the screen enables students to connect with each other in the digital space, it is also very isolating -- and not just because students are looking down at their devices instead of engaging with their surroundings hindering conversations. Research correlates social media consumption and social isolation; it’s possible to plot someone's feelings of isolation by monitoring the amount of time per day they spend on social media, in large part because they’re doing social comparisons and feeling worse about themselves. 5. Use the “introduce yourself to a stranger” assignment. This assignment asks students to introduce themselves to a specified number of people they hadn’t met before either every day or every week. The assignment aspect of it gives students a valid excuse for approaching someone they didn’t know and starting a conversation, helping to remove some of the shyness and intimidation some students may feel. This has led to many students finding common interests or even making new friends, helping them to feel less lonely. 6. Advise students about Self-Discrepancy Theory. The theory purports that self-esteem, in large part, derives from how we compare ourselves to two standards -- who we believe we should be and what we believe the ideal is. Students’ own self-concept will benefit when they are mindful of their inputs and understand that social media should not function as a scale for self-esteem because many things being posted are fictional and non-attainable. Empower students to know that they alone have the power to change the comparisons, as they reside in their own thoughts. 7. Help get conversations started. Students can engage with each other in discussion boards or in breakout rooms, giving them the ability to connect with and learn from each other. Instructors can use ice-breaker questions like “what would the title of your life’s story be, and why” to allow students to better get to know each other. 8. Use video. In addition to being more efficient than sending emails back and forth for hours on end, video conferencing with students helps to build connections with instructors and each other. Instructors can meet with students individually or in small groups. In asynchronous classes, video introductions can be used to allow students to get to know each other and discover common interests.  How Do You Promote Interpersonal Skills in Your Classroom? As an Interpersonal Communications instructor, Kelly opens her classes by underscoring the importance of having sustaining relationships, and the steps outlined above are some ways to nurture their development, but that’s just one of many options. These eight ideas are some of many designed to help support the development of interpersonal communications -- leading to happier and more successful students. The close relationships that students develop, more than money or fame, are what keep people them throughout their lives. “The way that students can get there is through interpersonal communication,” she noted. What tips or activities do you promote in your classroom for helping students develop interpersonal communication skills? Tell us in the comments below! To watch the full webinar and access the slide deck, click here. Learn more & request a copy of Steve and Kelly’s new edition of Reflect and Relate: An Introduction to Interpersonal. ... View more

Blog and activity developed and written by Laura Sells, Communication Instructor, Nicolet College. Sells is the author of the Instructor's Manual for Joshua Gunn's Speech Craft.   At the start of every semester, I remind myself about the old saw “start as you intend to proceed.” Crucial to setting the tone for the semester, the first day of class is a rich opportunity that many instructors unknowingly misspend and then wonder why the semester proceeds with students who are disengaged or reticent to participate in discussion. If instructors kick off their class without meaningful engagement, students tend to limit their participation and investment. In online and Zoom settings, something we’re all a little more familiar with now, engagement can be difficult to cultivate, making the process of tone-setting even more crucial. Going over the legalese of the syllabus can set a pattern that we will lecture and spoon-feed students the instructions for the duration of the course. Yet we often feel pressured to cover syllabus material in great detail. Online instructors have the right approach when they quiz students over the syllabus and policies during the first week of class, because it shows students how to take responsibility for their own learning and requires students to engage with the material. But some may think this approach impractical and heavy handed for face-to-face and Zoom-style classes. What follows is an active-learning activity for the first day of class to get students talking in groups about the syllabus, processing policy statements, and thinking about what will happen in the course. It also serves as a productive ice breaker to get students conversing with one another. It circumvents legalistic droning, though it does not eliminate it entirely. It also reduces the number of first-day repeat questions, because students often answer their own questions for each other through their small group discussions.   ACTIVITY Setup: Have students review the syllabus and make notes or write questions in the margins. Tell students that you will be doing an activity with the syllabus instead of going over it with them the way it’s traditionally done in most classes, so they need to read the syllabus instead of waiting for you to cover it. If they try to ask questions, gently defer them for the group activity. Step 1: Write on the board, show a document/PowerPoint, or give a handout with the three questions below. Have students write the answers to the questions. Pace them. Depending on how much time you allot for this activity, it should take about 5 – 7 minutes to answer these questions. 1. What are your hopes about this class? 2. What are your fears about this class? 3. What are your questions about this class, the syllabus, the textbook, the assignments, giving speeches, the instructor, etc.? Step 2: Put students in small groups or breakout rooms of about 4 or 5. Remember, the larger the size of the group, the longer it will take to finish the activity. Tell students to introduce themselves, discuss what they wrote,, and pick someone to report back to the class. Tell them to also pick their #1 burning question that they had for question 3. So, for example, they are usually able to figure out the answers to most of their questions through discussion, but they’ll have one or two questions left over that become their questions to ask during the class discussion. Once students are in groups, be sure to check in at least twice to set the pattern of good group work. The first time, check for understanding, but deflect questions about class for the debriefing. The second time, check pacing and make sure the group picked someone to report back to class. This helps keeps students on task. Step 2 can be accomplished fairly quickly, in about five minutes, but if you allow longer time, the students have an opportunity to bond over commonalities and the activity becomes an icebreaker. Pay attention to the flow of conversation and regroup when the flow of conversation has shifted to general social talk or awkward silence. Step 3: Go from group to group and call on the student who volunteered to report back to class. Have that student: 1. Introduce the group’s members 2. Summarize the answers to questions #1 and #2 3. Ask the group’s burning question Step 4: After answering the group’s burning question, the instructor can ask for a second question from the group or go on to the next group as desired. Once all the questions are asked and answered, usually all the primary points that need coverage are addressed and the instructor can cover the finer points more quickly. Although covering the syllabus in this fashion is less linear, it is more interactive, and the students have a hands-on experience with the class documents and with peer interaction. This promotes a tone in class that is less dependent on the instructor for direction. It also stands in for an icebreaker that opens the air for discussion in the next class. Bonus Step 5: The instructor can collect the answers and review hopes and fears aloud anonymously and talk about the commonalities, pointing out the common threads of communication apprehension, desire for a good grade, keeping up with the work, and so on, and talk about how these will be handled in the class. This can help establish community in the class.   Managing the first day of class is crucial to a successful semester. Students are wondering what they have gotten themselves into and instructors are wondering how many times they will have to say “It’s in the syllabus.” This activity acts as a fun middle ground that sets a positive tone for all.   What are your strategies for covering the syllabus on the first day? Comment and let us know! ... View more